Tuesday, April 12, 2011

The Most Important Relationships in a Teenagers Life

"Spiritually plateaued Adults leave a legacy that leads to spiritually plateaued teenagers." -Richard Ross

*These are notes taken from a Richard Ross talk at the Metro Youth Pastor's Conference on April 12, 2011

Who could be the most important relationships a teenager could have?

1. Mom and Dad *notes below on partnering with Parents in Ministry.

2. Prayer Mentor
An older adult that is desperately pursuing Christ. There are so many of these people in your church. They have a need to give, to be utilized, to be appreciated and to be a part of something worthwhile. They need to see your students as if they are 'orphans.' Disney gets the concept of orphans--in just about every great Disney movie, there is an orphan... and a hero. You need seasoned adults that love Jesus to be a hero to these orphans and leave a legacy of making Christ supreme in this generation. "The Orphaned Generation" by Scott Wilcher at www.scottwilcher.com This is a book written for Senior Adults to cast the vision of them giving their lives away to investing in the next generation.

3. Small Group Leader

4. Youth Pastor
You need to be Seminary to your Volunteers. Anything you know about how to connect with students-you teach your volunteers. Anything you know about youth culture; it's your responsibility to teach your volunteers. If you're a Youth Pastor that enjoys the fact that you're the 'expert' then you're not doing your job of educating those around you. Use your time with volunteers as an opportunity to train, encourage and enrich them in a way that they feel more qualified and prepared to do what God has called them to do. On another note, you should never have an adult volunteer serving in your ministry that are not worshipping with you, praying with you and being transformed spiritually in their personal life. Curriculum doesn't transform the hearts of our kids, it's the curriculum infused through the life of these adults... make sure you're doing your job in having the right adults serving in your ministry.


1. Help teach parents how to parent; bad parenting wrecks heart connections. Most parents are so busy 'managing' their kids schedules and lives that they forget to develop a relationship with their kids. Why don't parents know how to parent well? Because they weren't parented well. They're replaying the mp3 and hoping it turns out well...

2. Help awaken parents to Christ; How do we implement in our structure a way to partner with parents and equip them to do what God is calling them to do? Example: How are most parents dealing with bad behavior? They're Hollering & Screaming. Nowhere in Scripture does it say to speak louder and with more passion and enthusiasm if you want to redirect the heart of your kids... We holler because we were hollered at when we were kids.

3. Teach parents how to spiritually lead their kids; Is there anything in our programming that invests and develops the hearts of parents and enriches them in their journey? Only 12% of families do anything around or with a Bible. 12% We have a long way to go. When talking to parents, we're more passionate in asking them to get a form notarized than we are in pushing them to developing as a Godly parent. When Mom and Dad wake up spiritually... their influence has the ability to spearhead a movement within their family.

4. Create Inter-generational experiences; better than 'telling' parents how to do this, we need to find ways to 'model' it for them. It may be on a stage or personally, but when Dad see's that this is doable, it then becomes possible. When Mom and Dad are sharing their own experiences with Jesus, it's worth way more than a sermon from the Youth Pastor.

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